I accept I was wrong, I admit it and try to correct it.

So many of us who keep getting hurt at times do wonder why the person who hurt me could not say these simple words. Was the meaning of the words so difficult he could not understand? Was it ego? Was it self-centeredness? What was it?

I say it’s just the realization. Whenever there are occasions you get hurt by some act others did u realize it so soon but when u hurt someone during some random moment u do not realize very soon. It takes time for that realization to come. I am not talking about events where we directly/indirectly hurt others intentionally. I am talking about events where we ourselves do not realize that some random act has hurt the other person. This hurt can go as far as making the sweetest relationships go sour.

All it needed was a clear confrontation. About things like let us talk it out straight without any biases.

I had seen a play this weekend “Bade Bhai Sahab” It was a play directed on the famous short story written by Munshi Prem Chand. The story is about 2 brothers and their studies.
The elder one just wants to maintain "I am elder feeling”. In an effort to make sure his brother never gets diverted from his studies and do end up being a good educated person in life. He forgets that he had started bullying his brother unintentionally. There were occasions he would scold him without proper justification. He himself always used to fail while his brother would always pass with flying colors.
Somewhere he was trying to fill up for his failure as a student by shouting at his brother.
The younger one as a obedient brother always listens to him every time he gets insulted. He respects his Bhai Sahab. Then there was one day when the younger one reached his brother’s class and the next time he got a banter he shouted back saying you cannot shout at me as I am at the same level as you. It is you who fail and not me. Well all he did was let out his long time put aside hurt feelings and anger. He did not realize how that will affect his Bhai Sahab.
It was then the Bhai Sahab said yes I know I failed and u have been successful and tomorrow u will go ahead of me still I am 5 years elder to you and not even God can remove that difference. I will be your elder one forever. That’s where the story gets a tragic turn when they both realize their mistakes and they correct their mistakes. They say sorry to each other and life goes on.
Its only when they realized what wrong they did they could correct it. Now the question lies what it takes to realize our mistakes.

I feel it just takes a few moments of mental calmness and a peaceful mind state where one is ready to look beyond those hurt feelings, where one is ready to get into the other’s heart and figure out the cause of those hurt feelings. A state where one is ready to forget the anger, where one can look towards the opponent as oneself.

It is then we realize all it takes is to admit your mistake and u see the conversation was never that difficult. It’s only the realization that was difficult. Its very easy to blame but really difficult to figure out the reason behind anyone’s action. Only once when u try to fill in love in your thoughts u realize there could be so small reasons also which could have hurt others. It is then u realize what u consider a small issue could have actually appeared so big to the other one. It is only when u r ready to forget all the harsh feelings that u give way to those soft empathetic feelings. It is then u say those words effortlessly. It is then u figure out that by saying this u have filled your heart with joys and the anger, the hurt has just vanished away.

Life is too complicated, too fast to realize this I agree. But we never know a small act in right conscience may help us do that.

All we have to realize is what if someone behaves the same way with me?? How will I feel?